Well that last post wasn't exactly how I wanted it to be, but I wasn't sure when I'd be able to write again so I wanted to write as much as I could!
I got a voicemail yesterday that I wish I knew how to react to. Not sure if I should be happy, angry or maybe both. It made me ask "why now?". And a lot of other questions that I know I won't be able to answer. I have a lot of thinking to do now. Thinking and decision making that I was hoping and somewhat dreading I wouldn't have to do. It makes me wonder so much. There's parts of me that wish I could just forget about the whole thing, but at the same time, I just want to get it all figured out. Enough about this though, I'd rather not be asked about it, but I needed to say it.
Roweyn and I were able to go on another walk today. It's beautiful outside! It's so nice to get out even if it is only for 30 minutes. I hope there's more days like this to come. It's a nice break thats for sure.
I gave Roweyn a bath last night which she absolutely loves doing! I put her on her tummy on a towel on the bathroom floor while I was getting everything ready and it was amazing what she was trying to do. She held her head up the whole time which is crazy for her age. But not only did she do that...she was kicking and moving her legs and feet all over the place like she was trying to crawl! And she actually moved herself forward! I wish I had been able to get it on video. My mom, dad and I were all so excited. I wish I could give her a bath every night cause it relaxes her so much, but it would dry out her skin too much. She slept from midnight to 5:30 though. It was so nice. I hope there are more nights like last night soon.
Roweyn's getting more and more alert every day. It's so fun just to sit and talk to her and watch her and see how she reacts. She does this squinty eye thing when she looks at you, it cracks me up every time. She tries to talk to us too, but nothing comes out yet, she just moves her mouth and sticks her tongue out. It's a very cute attempt. She has so much personality already! I love it! She's sleeping right now and she's doing that little humming noise that I was talking about before. So precious. She sounds like she's snoring.
I'm trying to make a trip up to Eureka soon so all my family up there can see Roweyn. My mom wants to go up Valentines Day weekend, but that's so soon! And I'm not sure I'm ready to travel with Roweyn yet, let alone make Roweyn sit in her carseat for 6 hours. Especially my moms car which is horrendous to drive in and not an ideal car to travel with an infant in. The sooner the better though, but she's so young. We're still trying to get a routine down, and she eats and sleeps so much still that it's hard to do anything. And not being home in an environment we're both used to worries me, but I know we have to start branching out more. I just think it would be easier if she were a bit older. I can either risk going now and just deal with whatever happens, or wait it out just a little longer in hopes that it will be a little easier. Yeah, no idea what I'm going to decide.
Well Roweyn is bound to be waking up any minute now. So if I don't end this now and go get something to eat I probably won't get another chance for quite a few hours. Till next time....
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
It's been a month now since Roweyn was born, and wow what a month it has been! Roweyn was born on December 27th 2009 at 4:19pm, weighing 5lbs 4 ounces and 19.5 inches long. December 27th was also my oldest brothers 32nd birthday. When we left the hospital Roweyn weighed 5lbs and by her 3 day check up she had already gained 1.5 ounces.
You can never fully know what being a mom is like until you actually become one. Being a mom is a full time job! I don't know how mothers of multiple children do it, but I have a lot of respect for them. The last month I was pregnant I couldn't fall asleep until midnight or later, but now I'm ready for bed by 8! Unfortunately for me, Roweyn isn't ready for bed till 11:30 or later and then she's up every few hours after that, anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours or more. Oh how I long for a night of uninterrupted sleep and being able to sleep in, but those days are long gone now! I find myself wishing there was more time in the day for the amount of naps I would like to take. Every mom I have talked to has given me the advice to sleep whenever baby is sleeping. Best advice you could ask for!
The first two weeks of being home I'd say were all about Roweyn and me getting to know each other. They also consisted of non-stop eating, sleeping and dirty diapers. But I can now successfully tell the difference between all her different cries. When she's hungry she makes the cutest noise, when she's gassy or needs to burp she grunts and pulls her legs up towards her belly and so on. She doesn't like to sleep on her back, therefore she ends up sleeping on her tummy, either on mine or my moms chests at night. Which makes it that much harder for both my mom and me to get a good nights rest. When she's in a deep sleep she sleeps with her mouth open and sometimes makes a humming noise. Its so funny to hear. She is so precious when she dreams, she smiles constantly in her sleep.
At 3 weeks she has become more alert, she's making eye contact and she's recognizing our faces. She's also using her arms and hands more too, she's wrapping her arms around ours and grabbing onto our clothes. It's exciting to see her progress. I can't wait to see what she does next!
I finally was able to take Roweyn for a walk yesterday after almost 2 weeks of storming. It's really hard to get out with a newborn, so it was definitely a much needed and wonderful walk. I'm hoping the weather will start to get better so we can get out more often.
It's now 10:30pm and Roweyn's eating again, hoping she'll fall asleep soon so I can go to bed too!